Last month, my older brother had a kidney stone removed. Since we live hundreds of miles apart, I couldn’t be at the hospital when he came out of surgery but I still wanted to let him know I was thinking about him and wished him well.

This, unfortunately, prompted a bit of a dilemma: sending a get well card seemed like too little effort, but sending a flower arrangement to a man felt strange, too. Oh, sure, I could’ve opted for a balloon bouquet or maybe one of those edible things, but both are still too girly for a manly man like my brother.

Eventually, I opted for a bonsai tree ordered from the same place where I get all of my flower arrangements and hoped he wouldn’t think it was too frou-frou. Since he has allergies, I knew to send something that wouldn’t leave him sneezing uncontrollably while trying to recover from major surgery. A plant seemed like a perfect option and, as a side benefit, a bonsai plant would give him an excuse to use some of his favorite knives in his collection to keep the thing trimmed. That’s manly, right?

While visiting my brother last month I got a chance to check out how his bonsai tree looked. Let me just say, I was impressed: not only its decorative pot of a better quality than I expected, the plant was thriving and even more lush than the picture. As for my brother, he actually got a kick out of receiving a bonsai instead of a colorful flower arrangement because it was a “manly” gift that will last far longer than a bouquet would.

Which is a good thing since he was back in surgery last week to have his sinuses drilled in the hope of alleviating some of the pressure and discomfort that have plagued him for years. Or so he tells me. Personally, I think he’s just angling for another bonsai tree so he has a matched set for his kitchen counter.