Every morning, hangover or holiday, I wake up to this man. I have for years, as a matter of fact, although my husband doesn’t know it. I read Dustbury.com not only for the way he tortures song titles to fit blog posts and the obscure news about Oklahoma (where I was born), but also for the strange and obscure search engine queries that he regularly features. Oh, and the religion lessons.

So I was pretty darned please when Chaz volunteered to let me take a whack at him. As follows:

1. What is your biggest pet peeve?

Vincible ignorance: when people don’t know because they don’t want to know.

2. The underwear drawer: folded or stuffed?

I fold, more or less neatly, yet somehow it ends up being stuffed. I attribute this to a combination of shallow drawers and bulky, um, drawers.

3. If you were in charge of the FCC, what rules would you have concerning topics or words that could not be addressed when children might be watching?

I would expand the current labeling system. For instance, “TV Y7 FV” specifies ages 7 and up due to “fantasy violence”; I’d add the “FN” tag to denote “fantasy news,” which is far more common.

4. Let’s say I’m about to show up at your house for dinner. What are you cooking? (Yes, you must cook!)

I grill a pretty mean ribeye; add whatever veggies were freshest at the market this morning, and maybe a bed of “wild rice” (which, I am told, is neither wild nor rice) underneath it all. Your choice of beverage, of course. And maybe I’ll dig up my infamous Banana Split Pie recipe. [Just don't call me late for dinner! - VK]

5. Name three things that make a blog suck.

1. Neglect: failure to update on something resembling a regular basis. (A subset of this would be “inadequate spam controls”: nobody wants to read your archive pages if they’re filled with offers to sell Tramadol.)

2. Ignorance of one’s own template: running pictures that don’t fit, URLs that cause people to have to scroll, widgets and gadgets that don’t work or work only sporadically.

3. Not linking to EV. [Good man. - VK]

6. Which Muppet would star as you in the Muppet movie about your life?

Oscar the Grouch. He’s got the facial expressions and the attitude.

7. I seem to recall you were once a fan of wet wipes. How’re those working out for you?

As a rule, the better they work, the less I need them.

8. Where do you consider the most “exotic” place on earth, and why haven’t you gone there yet?

The back streets of Istanbul. Actually, I’ve come close (within a couple of miles, in fact), but a combination of overly-restrictive planning and mindless fear prevented me from exploring further.

9. How has the world changed the most since you were a kid?

Being a kid is not allowed to be interesting anymore: it is assumed by (almost) all and sundry that you must be insulated from the Cruel World, that any initiative you take is at the very least unwarranted and probably dangerous, and that if you scrape your knee you have proven beyond the shadow of a doubt that we just don’t have enough laws. And the new, expanded Nanny State has served notice that it will treat adults just as badly.

10. Complete this sentence: “What VK doesn’t know about me is…”.

Once a year I come awfully close to the Venomous Compound. Then again, she may know that anyway.

If you’d like to get interviewed on ElectricVenom.com, contact VenomousMe at Gmail.

Monday, July 2nd, 2007, 2:06 pm   |   Blog bites  |  RSS feed Comments and pings are currently closed.