Although the temperatures outside still hover just short of unbearable, “fall” is in the air at my house. For several days now I’ve been getting ready for “back-to-school” which — as a homeschooling mom — means that I’ve about had my fill of unstructured days in which my chores (which never seem to take a vacation) are interrupted by repeated groans of “I’m booooorrrrreeeed.” (News flash, son: So is Mommy. Why don’t you try scrubbing underwear while I play video games, eh?)

So last week I decided to get organized. I cleaned and stowed the last few pieces of our camping gear that had still been sitting in the kitchen (which also serves as our classroom), weeded through last year’s curricula to see what we’ll continue using this year, ooohed and ahhhed over the pretty flyers and catalogues all the homeschooling organizations have been sending me… then realized I can’t begin to think about starting school until my house is back in order.

Sometime on Wednesday I decided I needed a better plan. Notice that I did not use a capital P — I just wanted to do a once-over in the kitchen, maybe tidy up the family room a bit. Then I’d get around to planning next year’s curriculum.

By the time I’d weeded through the piles of paperwork on the kitchen counter — Oh, there’s that checkbook I was looking for last month! — I’d found all sorts of toys, books, single socks and other detritus that needed to be put away elsewhere. Of course, that meant I actually had to walk through other parts of the house… like my kids’ bedrooms. Well, fine. I’d take care of those before moving on to the kitchen. After all, I can’t consider the kids’ rooms as being truly clean when there might be toys laying around other parts of the house that need to go back to their rooms.

Thursday morning I started cleaning my kids’ rooms bright and early. I’d managed to put away clean laundry, toss out broken toys, pack up outgrown books and clothing for Goodwill, take down the curtains and toss them in the washing machine and get a little dusting done before my son woke up. Perhaps I shouldn’t have tried dusting his forehead as he slept.

Unfortunately, he woke up with a stomach ache which meant I had to carry him, football-style, into the bathroom before he could puke all over the hallway’s white carpet. While he was disgorging what little remained of the prior night’s dinner I noticed that he still hasn’t learned to pee without hitting the floor. So, after tucking him in bed with a new book and a glass of 7-Up, I figured I’d clean the kids’ bathroom. Then I’d get back to finishing their bedrooms before finishing the laundry before finishing the kitchen which needed to be done before I could start planning next year’s curriculum.

That bathroom took a lot longer than I expected. Perhaps that’s because I also had to clean the hallway outside of it where each kid piles its laundry when the other is occupying the bathroom where the laundry basket is stored. Then, of course, as soon as the hallway was cleaned and I’d moved back to cleaning the bathroom my little boy decided to come puke all over it — walls, floor, sink, vanity… everywhere but the sparkling clean toilet. Which meant that on Friday I accomplished precisely the same thing I’d accomplished the previous day. I swear sometimes I feel like I’m on a human HabiTrail.

My son’s feeling much better this morning. Good thing, too. I need his help cleaning the family room so I can make sure I’ve got all of his toys picked up and returned to his room so I can finish cleaning that, including washing his bedspread, which needs to be done so I’ve got the laundry out of the way so it’s not on the kitchen counters which I need to scrub before mopping the kitchen floor which needs to be done before I can start planning next year’s curriculum.

But first I’m having a martini.

Saturday, July 22nd, 2006, 8:51 pm   |   Education Bites, My Venomous Life  |  RSS feed Comments and pings are currently closed.