When Cigarettes Are Outlawed Only Criminals Will Smoke
Most smokers, accustomed to being social pariahs, have a handful of snappy comebacks to those anti-smoking crusaders who assault us whenever we light up. I always like to point out that smoking is an anti-social habit, so why the hell are they interrupting my private time? Another one of my favorites: “What’re you bitching about? It’s killing me!” Now, though, I’m just going to tell them: “Why don’t you move to Bhutan?”
The tiny, trendy Himalayan kingdom recently became the world’s first nonsmoking nation. Since Dec. 17, it has been illegal to smoke in public or sell tobacco. Violators are fined the equivalent of $232 — more than two months’ salary in Bhutan. Authorities heralded the ban by igniting a bonfire of cigarette cartons in the capital, Thimphu, and stringing banners across the main thoroughfare, exhorting people to kick the habit. As if they have a choice.
A bonfire of cigarette cartons. Now that’s some second-hand smoke.
Disclaimer
First: For the self-righteous anti-smoking prigs who will inundate my InBox regardless of this disclaimer, let me just remind you that I have a delete button and I’m not afraid to use it. Second: No, we don’t smoke in the house or while driving with our kids in the car, because that would expose our children to our bad habits, and we fully believe in letting them pick their own. Third: Don’t bother with the “second-hand smoke is dangerous!” comments because, no matter how cool technology has become, there’s no way in hell that my cigarette is affecting you. Thanks.
- The Management
I admit that I am an anti-smoker. Finding my young, beautiful mother dead on the bathroom floor did that to me. Mom was only 45 — a year older than I am today. She smoked three packs a day from the age of 16. She had a heart attack while my dad was away on a business trip.
Look into the faces of your children and think about the nightmares they’ll have if what happened to my mom happens to you. I’m not trying to be preachy or dramatic. It is simply the truth.
A cigarette was my mom’s trademark. She was incredibly cool, a talented hair dresser, business owner, and a classic rebel. I wish that her grandchildren could have known her. I wish she could have retired with my dad. He’s married to another lady now and I don’t get to see him very often.
But, most of all, I miss the long conversations I had with my mom. I miss playing Scrabble with her until two in the morning. She was my best friend and she’s not there to talk to when I need her — or when something great happens.
I was 26 when she died. It was three days before the medical examiner told us that she’d died of a heart attack. In the meantime, the police handled it as a suspicious death. They treated our family home like a crime scene, filled plastic bags with Mom and Dad’s personal items, took everything from the medicine cabinet. The waiting was horrible.
I feel extremely guilty that I never asked my mother to quit smoking. So, I try to make up for it by asking other mom’s to quit. I don’t nag or treat them with disrespect. I just tell them what happened to my family and let them choose for themselves.
God. Some people just don’t pay attention.
I can now imagine that now the American Lung Association the Cancer Society and the Heart Association will want us to do the same as well then there henery(wacky)waxman and the reat of the health freaks what kind of weird stuff is this? we dont need to follow another countries example into socialism we need to say to the world come here for help but dont give us your cocamemie ideas
Eat right. Don’t drink. Don’t smoke. Always wear your seatbelt.
Die anyway.
Personally, I happen to be looking forward to a weekend in the company of the largest group of our fellow smokers I’m ever likely to encounter.
Legi$lated morality alway$ make$ the wage$ of $in worth more. Thi$ will make the $muggler$ rich.