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Photo Credit: AP.
Winners announced Monday (or so)!
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1. If Kerry says ONE more stupid thing, you’ll forget YEAARRGHHH, right?
2. So the proctologist said to me….
Nanoo Nanoo!
Look at this face. Right here. Does this look like the face of a crazy man?
…wait, don’t answer that.
Howard Dean inadvertently points out who the dumbest person in the room is, while speaking to journalists.
Of course I know my ass from a hole in the….look, this right here is my ass. Cause I know my ass.
In fact, Bob, I actually don’t have any upper teeth; my advisors tell me this is an environmental adaptation.
Look, he said he had only one drink…now would you let that Chappaquidick thing go already?
My chances of ever coming near getting the Presidency again? Um…..
Our victory strategy for Iraq involves some sitting and spinning…like so.
Howard the Duck speaking to reporters about his eventual trip home.
“I’ve got a plan so cunning, you could put a tail on it and call it a weasel.”
(and yes, I know that’s from Black Adder, but it seemed too good to pass up…)
“The same thing we do every four years, Pinky….try to take over the government.”
“Sssshhhh…not so loud. The guy right…over…there…is listening.”
Do not heckle me sir! I repeat do not heckle me sir. I’ve been trained by Michael Richards on how to handle to pricks.
Do not heckle me sir! I repeat do not heckle me sir. I’ve been trained by Michael Richards on how to handle you pricks.
“Pull my finger..”
This… THIS… is the very finger I used to give myself the UFIA that caused the famous scream.
“As you can see by my face, I have recently hit a wall.”
“Do not ask to smell my finger, for it smells of Al Gore.”
As of last November 7th, We’re number one! And the Republicans? They Lost! YYYYYEEEEEEAAAAAARRRRGGGHHHH!
No Officer, I will not put my finger in my mouth!
“First of all, let me welcome the delegate who was able to attend tonight…”
“This little Gospel light of mine, I’m gonna let it shine. This little Gospel light of mine, I’m gonna let it shine. This little Gospel light of mine, I’m gonna let it shine. Let it shine, all the time, let it shine!”
Uhm… I think I just did… “Number One”…
“Yes, I am constipated and No, these things don’t just normally work themselves out.”
Am I qualified to be president? Well no, but I stayed at a Holiday Inn….once.
What do you mean? I AM smiling, see?
One moment please. I have this horrendous gas bubble I just must pass…ARRRRGGGGHHHHH…Now, what was your question?
I said no crotch shots, point that camera up here.
(singing the finale from the Chorus Line)…