An haiku in honor of yesterday’s Google spanking:
First, do no evil:
Google’s promise long ago.
Then they made money.
Are you still licking your wounds after being thrashed by Google yesterday?
Here’s a fun way to cheer up and win free flowers!
That’s right: Electric Venom and the folks at Flora2000 – Premium Flowers Worlwide have teamed up to bring you this contest, with the lucky winner getting a prize of $80 in free flowers delivered anywhere in the United States WORLD!
Send roses to your roommate, or to me. How about an iris for someone in Israel, or for me? Snapdragons for someone in Saigon, or for me? You could order gardenias for your grandma in Greece, or for me. How about an azalea for your auntie in Aruba, or for me? Maybe you’d rather have a bouquet delivered down the hall to your boss, or to Kansas just for me? Well, as you can see, the possibilities are limitless! And, no, you don’t have to send them to me.
How do you get in on the action? The rules are simple:
1. Write a haiku about Google. Love ‘em, hate ‘em, it doesn’t matter: just make sure you stick with the format.
2. Leave your haiku in the comment section along with a valid email address so I can contact you if you’re the winner. (Your email will not be shared with anyone else.)
3. Enter as often as you like, but only ONE entry per comment.
4. The winner will be announced Monday sometime before midnight (Central U.S. time.)
What are you waiting for? Have at it, folks!
Thursday, October 25th, 2007, 10:18 am | 
Time Wasting Bites | 
RSS feed
Comments and pings are currently closed.
October 25, 2007 at 12:32 pm
My page rank equals
what I think of Google ranks.
My rank is zero.
October 25, 2007 at 1:06 pm
I remain the same
Google spanking me
hard hit is hollow
October 25, 2007 at 1:11 pm
Adsense was once cool,
Then you canceled my account,
I clicked on my ads.
October 25, 2007 at 1:15 pm
Your stock is so high,
How can I afford any?
Ya’ll are so damned rich. >:O
October 25, 2007 at 1:16 pm
Such a humble start,
Won’t you please give me money
I swear I won’t compete.
October 25, 2007 at 1:16 pm
Googles number one
These haikus are hard to write
Undeniable.
October 25, 2007 at 1:17 pm
Google – bla bla bla
Let me win all those flowers
They’re for my girlfriend.
October 25, 2007 at 1:18 pm
Lori your haiku is wrong and it sucks anyway.
October 25, 2007 at 1:19 pm
Google claimed “We’re nice!”
My page rank was way too low
Then they reamed me hard
October 25, 2007 at 1:28 pm
My page rank was three
Such a lovely little three
Now it is one. Sad
October 25, 2007 at 1:30 pm
Google stole my rank!
I was getting lots of cash
then Google got mad
October 25, 2007 at 1:33 pm
Now stuck in our chairs
plotting revenge on Google
but Google just laughs
October 25, 2007 at 1:42 pm
My Dearest Google;
I hate you so hard, right now.
From; Bluepaintred’s blog
October 25, 2007 at 1:45 pm
Kate asked for haikus
Some people wrote more than one
I think that’s cheating
October 25, 2007 at 1:47 pm
Kate said quite clearly
Enter as much as you like
But one at a time.
October 25, 2007 at 1:52 pm
Yes Kate was quite clear
unlike that nasty Google
who broke all our hearts
October 25, 2007 at 2:17 pm
I love you, Google! (or, loath!)
Let me count the ways: Fourteen
Thousand in two seconds….
October 25, 2007 at 2:37 pm
Actually, my haiku is a series and will best be read consecutively. Here’s hoping no one posts in between and breaks the flow! ^_^;
I have used Adsense,
haven’t even been paid yet
made money else where.
October 25, 2007 at 2:37 pm
Just when I began
to get a steady income
my site’s PR dropped
October 25, 2007 at 2:38 pm
Heaven forbid that
the peon should pay the bills
let her be smited.
October 25, 2007 at 2:39 pm
Google has spoken
Joana’s income is gone
that is Google’s law.
October 25, 2007 at 2:50 pm
Life On The Planet,
my site, is ad free, and so
Google matters not.
October 25, 2007 at 2:52 pm
I feel pain for those
who have lost money because
Google is greedy.
October 25, 2007 at 3:12 pm
Now I fear the change,
Which is good, because Google
Took all my money.
October 25, 2007 at 3:17 pm
What flowers would I
Send to Google? No matter,
As long as they’re dead.
October 25, 2007 at 3:20 pm
On further thought, I
Think I might have to find a
Florist with these ones.
October 25, 2007 at 3:45 pm
Sell your links, get smacked.
Google wants relevant posts.
Bull, Google wants money.
October 25, 2007 at 3:54 pm
Whoops, missed a syllable. Here’s a different one.
Unethical Twerps
Google Page Rank is useless
Switch back to Yahoo
October 25, 2007 at 4:56 pm
seven stinking chimps
flinging poo at each other
we work for google!
October 25, 2007 at 5:01 pm
google is satan
deliver us from evil
go play outside now
October 25, 2007 at 5:14 pm
I gave Google clicks.
And then they gave me Anal.
Lost my Page Rank, Pricks.
The best one ever…..
October 25, 2007 at 6:12 pm
Ads Make Sense AdSense
Words Make Ads Just Like AdWords
Screw Google Use LinkWorth
October 25, 2007 at 6:34 pm
Sorry I can’t count, I’ll try again:
Google gives me gas
Let’s build a new search engine
Call it Beano com
October 25, 2007 at 6:41 pm
google only cares
about making cash, piss off!
google can bite me
I tried!
October 25, 2007 at 7:11 pm
Obviously, I can’t enter my own contest. But, if I DID it’d be:
Christmas will suck here.
Google destroyed my income.
Die you mo-fos, die.
October 25, 2007 at 11:08 pm
Targeting Solution
The applications
should do no evil, yet are
wicked Google’s spawn.
October 26, 2007 at 1:07 am
They said “do no harm”
Altruistic brainy boys
Playing with our lives
October 26, 2007 at 1:10 am
Write quality posts
Do not give page rank away
Linking to myself
October 26, 2007 at 1:14 am
A different day
PR dropping through the floor
Death of thousand cuts
October 26, 2007 at 1:16 am
Do you even care
What you have just wrought on us
Do you even know
October 26, 2007 at 1:20 am
Substandard search engine
Does not know its own rules yet
No longer a choice
October 26, 2007 at 1:22 am
Take your tasteless ads
Stick them where the sun shines not
Color yourself brown
October 26, 2007 at 1:24 am
Search on my brother
For it matters not one whit
Just boycott Google
October 26, 2007 at 1:27 am
Place gadzillion zeros
After two heartless bastards
And you have Google
October 26, 2007 at 1:28 am
What was it I did
No follow, do follow
Maybe linky love
October 26, 2007 at 1:30 am
Toolbar sans Google
For cleaner, better results
No more search for you
October 26, 2007 at 2:07 am
For links that are sold
To Make Us Bloggers Money
This sh!t ain’t funny!
October 26, 2007 at 2:15 am
Text link companies,
Google wants to buy you out.
Monopoly!
October 26, 2007 at 6:06 am
Google was a firm
Its engine indexed the Web
Now it’s just a verb
October 26, 2007 at 7:49 am
Google rules the net.
I watch my page rank tumble;
My tears fall like rain.
Trackbacks
October 26, 2007 at 10:17 am
March 22, 2008 at 1:01 am
February 6, 2009 at 1:22 pm